Straight Sangria

You just got rid of the dreaded virus that shall not be named. You’re obviously looking to get krunk on something delicious tonight, right? After a week of enjoying Everclear straight from the bottle, it’s time to actually enjoy what you’re gulping down your gullet. Sangria is the obvious choice. You decide to go for something different fruit-wise. You put pomegranate, pineapple, and guava in the blender along with a little lime juice. After blending it up, you taste it and fall in love. Why add alcohol to something this delicious?? So you skip the red wine and just pull the remaining Everclear straight from the bottle (for old-time’s sake). You puke all over your girlfriend’s nice new shoes. She send you to bed without fucking you. You cry and drink Sangria Straight from the blender mug.

This is a collab done by me (Qszwax) and isuamadog. What started out as a simple reimagining of my first original mix (Straight Chlorine) turned into something all its own and absolutely wonderful. The profile is a tropical limeade blend that’s almost like a sangria without the wine.

There’s 3 ways to enjoy this mix: as a plug-and-play limeade (take the lemonade and tahiti), as it is, or swap the Pink Guava for Sweet Guava and remove the Pineapple. All are very tasty.

To begin with, we took Puckenade, subtracted the FA Lemon Sicily, and added FA Lime Tahity Cold Pressed for a simple yet effective limeade. This was tasting amazing on its own and instead of adding the peaches from Straight Chlorine, we went a totally different direction: pomegranate. Pink Lemonade time? Yes Rico, pink lemonade time. I had both TFA and FA so naturally we went with FA Pomegranate. At 0.75% dog loved this but I wasn’t satisfied so I went rogue and added an extra 0.5%. We both agreed that it added more fullness. So with the basic pink lemonade in place we opted for a nice guava. The original plan was CAP Sweet Guava but FLV Pink Guava is one of my all-time favorite flavors so we split the mix to try both. I wasn’t a big fan of the Sweet Guava but absolutely loved Pink Guava, whereas dog was a major fan of Sweet Guava. This was probably attributed to the sweetness of the Sweet Guava and the fact that I’d already added sweetener whereas he didnt. At this point we were both extremely satisfied with the mix but dog wanted to take it a step farther. He went rogue, upped FLV Pink Guava to 1.8%, and added 3% INW Pineapple. I played along and was soon rewarded. The new mix was a little muddled, but really good. Good in a way that everything meshed so well together it created a new flavor. That flavor? Non-alcoholic sangria. We were perplexed as obviously there’s no red wine in this. At this point we called it a night and decided to slap it on ATF.

Mix with your favorite amounts of sweetener and coolant. Cheers!

-Posted from my vooping toilet