Beginner Blending Strawberry Cream Bull Shit Fuck You.
I just wanted to stop vaping Smother U for a few days, and felt like something fruity for Monday's show. Another bullshit strawberries and cream. Mix it if you want, ignore it if you want, I don't really care. It's pretty alright, though. The Vanilla Whipped Cream and CAP Bav Cream is quite nice in here. Mouthfeel is a little strange so I might mess with that later, but for now, it's thick and sugary and the strawberries do come through pretty nicely.
"Fuck it." - Jerry aka DrunkLord aka BIGDICKMFER
Decided to start a fight during Listen To This With Yanchunis when ol CenCalVape said fruit recipes were boring. Tried to coax him into a live mix off but he displayed true cowardice, so I still went with it. My dude DrunkLord aka Jerry aka Barry aka Dairy aka Mary suggested a dragonfruit recipe, so that's what we got here. Something like a dragonfruit/pineapple bubble gum. I'm not going to give crazy notes on this because, well, this was a bullshit five minute off the top mix.
However, it's pretty decent if you're looking for a new shake and vape fruit recipe. That Juicy Fruit bubble gum flavour is up front here, but the body of the mix has some nice tropical and pineapple notes, and that strawberry candy sweetness comes in on the back end.
It's been a minute since I've enjoyed a simple fruit mix, so I'm happy. Give it a mix and keep fucking up.
What up, nerds? CokeCan here with another fuckin bamboozler of a recipe, a little Apricot Tobacco mix. Pull up a chair and get ready to fuck around with another bangin tobacco vape. But you know me, I like to keep them tobacco recipes friendly to people that may not actually dig tobaccos.
So first off, we got FA Apricot. If you don't have this concentrate in your possession yet, stop being a boo boo baby asshole and throw it into your cart right now or I'm going to find you and I'll pummel you into submission. Then use your unconscious body like a puppet and make you order it anyway. You can thank me later. This shit is one of the best flavours I've come across in my year plus of mixing. It is my replacement for that razor blade bullshit that is TPA Juicy Peach and basically any other peach concentrate on the market. This shit is potent. It's like pulling a ripe as fuck apricot off whatever plant those shits grow on and biting right into that juicy orb of sexual prowess. There is some slight tartness to it, like most other stone fruits, but it's so goddamn heavenly. No harshness to be found, just a perfectly accurate apricot. I guess you're fucked if you don't know what that tastes like. Welcome to Flavour Town, you fucking maniac.
So I'm backtracking but whatever, I said all peach flavours suck, and while I stand by that, JF Honey Peach is tasty. It is more mellow and works better as an accent note to something like FA Apricot. But this concentrate has some smooth creaminess to it with subtle notes of peach and citrus, almost like those peach ring candies. It adds just a touch of extra sweetness to FA Apricot that just works here. You don't necessarily need it here, but it is a nice addition.
Tobacco. JF RY4 Double. It's great. I know I love FA Soho, but this shit is just as good. Soho is mild and light, while RY4 Double has a deeper and darker note to it with hints of caramel and wood. Those notes play beautifully with the apricot to create something of a bakery profile. And if you know anything about me, you know I'm an impatient piece of shit, and JF RY4 Double doesn't need much steeping to be good. There's no weirdness to it straight away, and it just improves and pushes itself to the front of recipes after steeping. This concentrate is also great for both sides of the tobacco spectrum. If you like that flavour in your recipes, you'll notice it's tobacco body and be satisfied. If you aren't trying to fuck with tobacco flavours, this one will fuck your mouth with bakery notes of brown sugar and caramel.
The other flavours here, TPA Toasted Marshmallow, TPA Brown Sugar, CAP Vanilla Whipped Cream, and FW Butterscotch Ripple are all here to accent the beauty that is FA Apricot. The toasted marshmallow and vanilla whipped cream add some more mouthfeel and body to the mix, while bridging the gap between the extremes of fruit notes and tobaccos. The brown sugar and butterscotch ripple accentuate the cream notes and play off the fruit to create something similar to a poached apricot. Honestly, this whole recipe is just to showcase how fucking versatile this apricot concentrate truly is. It's like a computer program was invented that is your perfect sexual partner. A digitized creature that will fulfill every depraved fantasy at once and still tell you it loves you after you melt into a puddle of self doubt and infatuation due to how quickly you finished.
Fuck it, I don't want to talk anymore. Just mix this up and vape it.
Fuck. So I've a buddy that occasionally buys juice from me, and he's been on me to come up with a blueberry vape for him for the past few months. Being that I literally have one blueberry concentrate, I assumed it just wasn't going to happen. Blueberry also really ain't my cup of tea for vaping, so I just said fuck it and kept mixing up Lazy Saturday and Nebula for him.
Well, he came through today and asked again for a blueberry vape, so I said "fuck it" and whipped this up in about 5 minutes. Mixed it up, gave it the ol' jerk off shake, and dripped it onto my coils. And let me tell you, this shit is fuckin bangin. Let's go through how this came about, in the 5 minutes I spent thinking about it. I fully anticipated this one to be a pile of trash, much like me.
So the TPA Blueberry at 5% was hella daunting to me, but I knew any other time I'd tried it in other recipes, part of why I hated it so much was because I could never taste it. Boosted that shit to 5% and god damn, it's tasty as hell. Akin to something in between the blueberries you get in a blueberry muffin and some sort of blueberry candy. Very sweet, not entirely realistic, but still quite delicious. Adding that 1% of JF Juicy Lemon just amplifies that flavour and pushes it into the next realm of existence, because, well, if you don't already know that blueberry and lemon go hand in hand, then you're a fucking idiot. FA Forrest Mix was a great way to quickly add some added depth and dimension to the berry flavour. FA Fuji at 3% helps prevent this shit from being too much of a sweet candy type of recipe, and helps bring it more into a mouth-watering, slightly tart experience. Finally, TPA Marshmallow to round out the edges and blend everything together.
Honestly didn't expect much from this recipe, but it ended up being a pleasant surprise, much like what women say when they see my dick for the first time.
Fuck off, blueberry, I've defeated you.
First recipe of 2017 from ya boy. I've been chasing a straight up marshmallow recipe for nearly a year. Marshmallow Man was an e-liquid I really enjoyed before I got into DIY, and even though it has fond memories tied to it, I fucking hate it now. I tried it a few months ago and I honestly believe that shit is just 5% TPA Marshmallow and fucking 10% EM. Fuck that. So this isn't a clone, it's just me trying my hand at a straight up marshmallow. Creamy, thick, and sweet as fuck without any real sweetener.
This has been the collective effort of nearly a year of trial and error, getting pissed off, and making myself sick from some nauseating first attempts. In here, the use of the dual marshmallows really push that sweet flavour and thick mouthfeel. This shit is chewy, and I love it. Using both TPA and CAP Vanilla Bean Ice Cream pushes that mouthfeel without worrying about muting the flavour too much. JF Yellow Cake and TPA Bavarian Cream are in here to add more dimension to the marshmallows, while giving a touch of dark sugar sweetness to the creams. You already know why CAP Sugar Cookie is here. I usually use CAP SC at 3 to 4%, but here, 1% just gives enough of that warm cookie flavour without pushing the recipe into the realm of a bakery. Something new for me is CAP Vanilla Whipped Cream. This shit is goddamn perfect. It's thick and sweet at low percentages, and when it's pushed into higher percentages, it works as a beautiful addition to custards. Adds some of that "sour" note you want in a custard. Obviously I didn't want that here, so 1% just added some more vanilla notes while helping emulsify the other thick mouthfeel additions. Finally, TPA Vanilla Swirl and FA Meringue give the feel of sweetener without actually using EM.
Thanks to the Vanilla Swirl, Vanilla Whipped Cream, and Meringue, this recipe will succeed more after about 5 days. But you know me, I'm a shake and vape kinda mixer, and this shit is tasty as all fuck straight away. A little harsh because of the Vanilla Swirl, but nothing intolerable, and honestly, my nicotine might be turning bad, so I can't tell if it's that or the Vanilla Swirl giving me that slight throat hit. Either way, Shake and Vape certified.
I'm fucking glad to finally be able to release this shit. It's been a long, painful, arduous, and annoying road to get here. But now I'm vaping some fluffy, hella sweet nostalgia that just makes me smile. Give it a mix, let me know what you think, and keep fucking up.
I told y'all I'd do it. That end of year banger that wont necessarily make waves for Recipe of the Year, but should make you feel bad for giving Chrisdvr the crown. This shit is a simple mix with a twist. You already know this was the year of motherfuckers dropping revisions on different strawberry creams. We had Skiddlz dropping a countless flurry of the same recipe. We had Vurve and his dumbass Egyptian Cum bullshit. Can't forget ID10-T and his Game of Thrones dragon juice. Manson dropped Shortdick, might have been last year, I can't be bothered to pay attention, but either way, fuck off. Even the self-proclaimed God of DIY Wayne Walker jerkin off My Man and making a clone of it. Y'all trippin.
So let me bury these fucks in a shallow grave so I can watch them as they become worm food. We got the classic strawberries in here, no reason to fuck around with that. But then the mix of TFA VBIC and JF Bavarian Cream creates a real thick and sweet ice cream base with just a touch of that brown sugar and maple notes. Oh that touch of Butterscotch Ripple? Yeah, put that in your ice creams. Don't ask, just do. Thank me later. Finally, that little touch of coconut and meringue. That's where I'm fucking y'all sideways. I ain't fucked with coconut all that much, but in here, it lightens up everything without muting the heavy flavour. Instead of something with crazy mouthfeel, that coconut and meringue adds not only a punch of coconut milk sweetness, but also the subtle hint that you dropped a handful of those delicious coconut flakes in your ice cream.
Shake and vape certified, since that's what I'm about. But after two days, that meringue mixes in with everything to give the coconut flavours more sweetness and helps emulate more of that coconut milk idea. And it lets the VBIC get to it's prime. But shake it up and vape it and love it.
Fuck 2016. Fuck your resolutions and "2017 will be my year" bullshit. Next year is gonna suck too. Deal with it. Keep mixing. Keep fucking up.
Beginner Blending Live Mixing concoction. The idea came from DrunkLord aka Jerry aka Barry aka Dairy's request for a strawberry-pineapple La Croix recipe. In here, I avoided the obvious idea of using TFA Pineapple because the mix of TFA Dragonfruit and CAP Golden Pineapple creates something far more sweet and rounded out. My use of TFA Strawberry Ripe, TFA Strawberry, and JF Sweet Strawberry creates a lovely strawberry note that has the best blend of authentic strawberry notes with that candied strawberry syrup. The use of FA White Wine imparts the mouthfeel, throat hit, and flavour of a sparkling water to further link it to the La Croix counterpart. Using the low percentages of FA White Peach, JF Juicy Lemon, and FA Lime Tahiti Cold Press just creates a bridge of citrusy notes that not only boosts the fruit notes into an even better place, but also gives a little more body to the sparkling water element. If you're missing summertime during this cold front of winter, mix this up, kick back, and remember the sunshine.
Art by me. See more at http://www.matthew-kocanda.com
So ya boy is sick with a sore throat and some sneezy bullshit, so I needed something simple and smooth to vape on during the BBPodcast. FLV Milk & Honey was an obvious choice, but I wanted to add a little extra body and sweetness to it to mask some of that underlying chocolate notes that hide around in FLV M&H. CAP Sugar Cookie was the best choice. Just adds some great mouthfeel, makes it even smoother, and adds some great sugary sweetness.
A simple fucking mix. Nothing special here, but it's a great recipe if you're looking for a quick ADV that is smooth as fuck and sweet with a lot of full-bodied flavour.
Art by me. More work can be viewed at http://www.matthew-kocanda.com
For the last few months, I have been chasing a peach vape that wouldn't rip apart my throat on every hit. After finally getting JF Honey Peach in my arsenal and doing some single flavour testing, I have realized that THIS is a the concentrate I've been looking for. There isn't anything too complex about this mix, but it's fucking delicious. The peach notes hit straight away and are very prominent. The FA White Peach and FA Fuji help add some bright, tart notes to the overall sweet creaminess the rest of the ingredients impart. FW Butterscotch Ripple is a must have for any sort of bakery vape, and even though this isn't necessarily a bakery vape, it's addition in this mix helps add some brown sugar and caramel notes that were initially only supposed to help mute some of that assumed throat ripping harshness the peaches would create, but it also adds some real depth to an otherwise simple mix. As a shake and vape, this is incredible, no real need to steep at all.
Although delicious as it is, this will also work as a great base for any number of peach inspired recipes.
Art created by me : more paintings can be seen at http://www.matthew-kocanda.com
So I decided to give this update it's own post because this version is definitely far superior to V1.
This recipe started as a one-off to Drunken Pears, but as time has progressed and the recipe has evolved, it definitely has taken a spot as being a unique and interesting profile. Expect heavy cream notes on the exhale, and an explosion of apple, pear, caramelized sugar, and sweet cream flavours on the exhale and aftertaste. Pairs beautifully with bourbons, stouts, and whiskey cokes.
Art by me. See more at http://www.matthew-kocanda.com
From @Queuetue : I find boston rounds to be the very best bottles for mixing and temporary storage. I use them for my VG and PG as well as on the scale while I'm making a mix. With a top that's easy to fill, easy to cap and with minimal access to air, I keep a bunch on hand for unflavored base, or whatever project I may be up to for handy, quick access.
The tip is small enough to use with most top-fill RTAs or RDAs as well.