Tony's Wife's Revenge

(DISCLAIMER: Any similarities between Tony The Tiger and myself are purely intentional. Because, duhhhh...we're both like, tigers or something??)

When I heard what that two-timing, no-workin' couch potato of a husband said about me on ATF? I was like, "Oh HELLLLLLL no!"

Let me set this played out record straight once and for all:

For one thing, Tony did NOT fall into a deep depression because of Mr. Andy(aka Audrey) Snap(uses the "they"/"them" pronoun), Long Jack N. McCrackle, and "Pop" Meereally Hardson(though Tony would have the world believe otherwise!)!! That no-good "husband" of mine began a-drinkin' & a-druggin' with the massive profits from "his" cereal. And don't EVEN get me started on who TRULY came up with that damned recipe! Because I will REALLY start ripping skeletons from his closet if forced to do so!!

And now I'll once-and-for-all explain that "train" accusation my deadbeat ex-husband made about me. Because I can answer it with one damned sentence: It wasn't me. It. Wasn't. Me. And even if it was? Tony and that Cap'n (with that crunchy moniker) had been frolicking around in New York's gay bath houses wayyyyyy before I filed for separation and subsequently, divorce. That's right. I. Filed. And whoever files 1st is right folks. Well, to be truthful, whoever has the nicest boobs is right. And look at my boobs in that pic!! Meee-OWW!!

Additionally, he never killed any gnom...er, midg...,er, "height-challenged people". Puh-lease!! The only thing Tony managed to kill over the years was to kill "the mood" in our budjois('bedroom', for all of you not skilled in the French language).

I threw his butt to the curb because I could no longer tolerate the above behaviors, nor could I put up with him a-guzzlin' his hooch(and scratchin' his ball sack) on the sofa on our front porch(don't judge...we are from the South). And when he screamed, "Oh this is just GRRRREAT!! How will I be able to watch uncensored reruns of Family Ties out here??" I just slammed that broken screen door in his face and that was that. I was finally free of that no-good moocher!!

Or so I thought...it was awhile later when a friend sent me a screenshot of his libelous post on ATF. Let's just say this, if it's not true-I could sue that scheming prick for everything he owns(which at this point, is 1/2 of a moldy loaf of bread, old pizza crust crumbs between his Lazy Boy cushions, and sticky porn magazines [circa 1950]). So let us all see that supposed vid, Tony! If a video of me and those 3 'real' men exists? Prove it!! Pics, or the shit didn't happen!!

Tony was a lush when I met him, my friends! And with the success of his cereal, what do you think he became? I'll answer that question for y'all-he simply became a SUCCESSFUL lush!!

Anyhoooo, I hope that smarmy bastard thinks twice before calling me a whore in public again! Don't make me roast your nuts in public again fool!!

Love & Peace To All,

Toni

FLAVOR NOTES(because creative stories STILL are not considered cool anymore):

Okay. Let's start off with the addition of TFA Pie Crust. I dare you to take the lid off that particular concentrate, take a hardy sniff and NOT think it's the missing link in the magic that is Corn Flakes/Frosted Flakes! Go ahead. The rest of the class will wait.

The CAP Cereal 27/TFA Acetyl Pyrazine/FW Hazelnut is a pretty much 'tried & true' method of getting us started in the right direction to this specific malty, corn-like cereal flavor.

And then we come to...(insert sound effect of duhn duhn duhnnnn) the milk. My God, how I lovvvve milk! It's just so GRRRREAT(oops, sorry) on SO many daggon' levels. The temperature of milk, the texture of milk, and lastly, the TASTE OF MILK!!!! Thank Jesus I'm not lactose-intolerant because if I was? I would slit my wrists in a bathtub full of salt water and anti-coagulants, willingly bleed out & call it a day!

Again we have FA MERINGUE which we sometimes use to build 'milks'(okay kids, pretty much always we are using this concentrate to build milk. If it isn't included? The recipe just plain sucks and you shouldn't bother mixing it up!!<---hah! Just kiddin'. At least I think I'm kiddin'). Can I just add that-if FA Meringue was in the entertainment industry, it surely would be referred to as a "quadruple threat"), as it performs FOUR(unprecedented, I know!!) vital roles here:

(1)-the bridge that emulsifies our various creamy aspects together.

(2)-it provides a great foundation upon which to build our milk-like base.

(3)-the start of the sweet frosted sugary part of the flakes and/or bottom of the bowl of milk, and....ANNND??...okay, okay...there IS no 4th role for FA Meringue here. PSYCHE!! I lied(even though I was completely honest with Tony throughout our tedious relationship)!!

(4)-FA Meringue is of course, part of the milk. Oh wait. Okay yeah...there's no 4th part of its' role here. So in the entertainment industry FA Meringue would only be considered a triple threat. But still, a triple threat is way better than a single threat. And I'd bet mine & Tony's rundown trailer most would NOT argue that a triple threat is still better than a double threat. But I'm getting away from the notes here. Where the hell was I? Oh yeah...the milk part. OOO Milky Undertones In PG?? Well? You can't have a good "film-coating-your-mouth" milk without the 'ol undertone, now can ye? Only way you'll get THIS film out of your mouth is by brushing your teeth(all surfaces of your mouth, actually) and rinsing your mouth out with a generous portion of gasoline. WeeeeeHOOOOO! Boy HOWDYYY!

Oh yeah, FW Hazelnut also helps here with our milk and with that malty note which was no doubt started by the Pie Crust. Okay okay. So it's only a "double threat", that hazelnut. But we already agreed a double threat beats a single threat any day of the week and twice on Tuesdays!!

OPTIONAL(even though I find it pretty necessary):

1 drop WS23

1 drop Polar Blast

*Adding those 2 above enhancers to every 30ml of juice will make your milk a little more on the lukewarm side, instead of a hot vape. Go ahead! Add 'em and hot-diggety-do! Bob's your uncle(note to newbs: include at least 1 crazy British phrase to make all the UKers feel included)!!

VG Recommended 75%

Steep days: I vape it fresh. But it's better after(insert your own timeframe here, as mine hasnt even steeped a week so...it may suck). Really bad. Or? Not at all? Who knows? Hehe. Let's face it-we have a 50/50 chance here that it will be good. Or....bad, as I said!!

FOR THE BEST FROSTED CORN FLAKES CEREAL RECIPE & DESCRIPTION IN THE BUSINESS, GO HERE:

https://alltheflavors.com/recipes/41001#tony_s_revenge_frosted_flakes_on_steroids_by_steamon

Thank you for your "blessing" on this, Steam!! This recipe would have never been born without your PERFECT original!!

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